The Greatest Band That Never Was...

It was 20 years ago today, Mr. Myk taught the band to play,

Theye've been going in and out of style, but they're guarenteed to raise a smile,

So let me introduce to you, the band you've known for all these years....

It was the Pittsfield Elks Club, I think. It was about 1980. In what was their first professional gig as a band, Jet, the 3 man predecessor to the mighty rock n' roll juggernaught that became Pavlov's Dogs, was about to break the the champagne bottle over the bow of their opening set. It was a set of songs that would set the nation on a rock n' roll Odyssey of minimal proportions. The occasion was Carla Starbird's Wedding. Bigfoot's Pop, you see, was buddies with Carla's Dad. Having to pay for the wedding, and too cheap to hire a real band, he got Jet. Actually, he got BF's Da, and Jet came along for the ride. His Dad had a group of guys that were pretty slick with the Country and Western, and he figured ol' Jet would appeal to the younger people in the audience. How prophetically wrong he could be. Anyhow, after they got their lead guitarist a new pair of trousers (he had peed in his first pair out of stage fright) and wassled up one of the first of their many drummers, they found themselves opening with the theme from JAWS, transitioning right into Day Tripper by the Beatles. They were an immediate smash! Actually, they were moderately and politely received. In either case, the proof is in the pudding. Recent reports indicate Carla and her current husband are still happily, joyfully married. I'd like to think Jet played some small role in that.

The rest, as rock critics say, is History. Mr. Myk and his rag-tag band of scruffy lads from Liverpool (Palmyra Maine actually) would soon turn the music world on its ear, as Serious Attitude, Squeaky Mice and Pavlov's Dogs. They would go on to not show up at Buckinham Palace (where Bigfoot would famously claim that the P-Dogs were more popular than Jesus), not show up at Madison Square Garden, and most notoriously skate out of their gig at Newport Maine's Sesquacentennial Celebration. Bobby Johnston eventually checked himself into rehab, Val the little drummer gal got married and/ or preganat, Spot travelled the earth like Kane on Kung Fu, and Myk joined the Jesuits. It was like Bryan Adam's Summer of 69, on bad Pot. Only Bigfoot Chester eventually continued on as the surviving member of the Pavlov's Dogs. After years of constant touring, he can currently be found not showing up for gigs all around the State of Maine and New England.

So, on the eve of the 14th of February, 2008, let us raise a glass of something fizzy and say Happy Anniversary to the members of Pavlov's Dogs, wherever they may be (ah'm, Nursing Home...cough). Let us please pray for another fine year of not showing up for gigs.

And always remember...'ours go to '11'...